What's Your Fetal Position?

There are two types of people in the world:

People who believe that beings of equal value with competing interests can co-exist in the same physical body, and people who don't.

People who believe that a sperm, egg or fetus has rights that supercede the rights of autonomous human beings, and people who don't.

People who believe that motherhood is a punishment, and people who don't.

People who believe they're better equipped to make decisions on pregnancy than pregnant women and their healthcare providers, and people who don't.

People who believe they have a holy obligation to judge others, and people who don't.

People who believe that men should have the final say in procreation, and people who don't.

People who believe that anatomy is destiny, and people who don't.

People who believe that strict gender roles are morally sanctified and straying from them is sinful, and people who don't.

People who believe that the positive correlation between abortion access and overall quality of life in a country is, at best, an unremarkable coincidence and, at worst, a bald-faced lie perpetrated by a secret underworld collective of baby-hating scientists and Feminazis, and people who don't.

If you're the latter, welcome to the club. If you're the former, please be advised that this one is taken - get your own damn uterus.